Open House Presented by
SL Writers Group Oct. 13
Please come join us for an Open House presented by the Sun Lakes Writers Group on Tuesday, Oct. 13, 2020, from 12:30 to 2:30 p.m. in the Arts & Crafts Room at Cottonwood Country Club.
Because of the coronavirus, we would be limited to schedule 10 people only at this time—hopefully, more in the future.
If you are not familiar with the Sun Lakes Writers Group, please see our page in the Splash newspaper which appears every month.
We all have some stories we would like to share with others; life stories, poems, or just writing for fun. This is the place with a friendly group just for you.
Please call Barbara Schwartz at 480-802-5676 or Jacquie Ruffino-Platt at 602-400-6522, and we can always find a seat for you.
Ruby Regina Witcraft
Walk-in closets are a lady’s dream come true; that is if she has one, and I thankfully do. This was not the case in my last abode which was on the farm. At that time, all I was wearing was jeans, boots and breaches and a dress up or two when my husband entertained a client.
My husband decided that he would like to have the large closet in the guest room. This made my heart sigh a great WHEW of relief as I could now have the walk-in to myself and did I ever have a great time filling it.
There were his and her three-piece luggage sets on the top shelf with all of my hats and golf visors next. I had a few but planned on many as I played golf about five times a week. Now this may seem like overkill but the visor must match the cute golf skirts and shorts and don’t forget the socks. Next came craft boxes that I never got around to such as Origami, painting, ink and brushes for calligraphy and boxes of I don’t know what because I don’t remember. Turning the corner came a box with sections for purses. About 15 or 20. There again, I am from the matchy-matchy generation and they had to go with whatever I chose to wear.
Down below was a rod for seasonal clothes. A lady has to keep warm in the winter and cool in the summer so that rod changed with the seasons. The large rod facing the door accepted, appropriate, change of season items.
I know you just can’t wait to hear about the shoes, well, let me tell you. There was a section of shoes under the suitcases that held about 20 shoes and having a shoe fetish I filled every one of them. There were a couple pairs of golf shoes, tennis shoes, oh yes, I played tennis also. The rest were flats and heels.
Now that depicts my closet of 38 years ago so I must tell you I have really, really changed. Except for my 40-something typewriter which I kept because I didn’t think computers would last but here I am using one. That machine sat on the very, most top shelf in the closet and I finally decided that computers were here to stay. While deciding that I could not get even one more hanger squeezed in, I started purging and thought, “Hey, this is fun.” Of course, the typewriter has had its day so by standing on a sturdy little ladder and holding onto a dress rod, I could just reach it and pulled. That sucker decided not to leave and the next thing I knew there were five firemen standing over me telling me that I have a concussion. After a day in the hospital where I was checked and found fine, if not insane, they let me go.
In 38 years my closet has greatly changed. One set of matching luggage, no hats of any kind, no crafts, one red purse. A few, sort of, winter items in case it snows here, one pair of flats, one pair, not for tennis shoes, but just because they feel good, no golf shoes or heels, lots of slippers, one pair of Birkenstocks and no typewriter.
The Scariest Place in the House
There is one place in the whole house that we sometimes feel a dread to go into. It’s not the basement, with all of its scary things, waiting to jump out at you. The spider webs are a dead giveaway for what is crawling around down there. The pieces of dried, and crumbling bug parts hanging off their silky strands, that sway in drafts of this underworld are a foreboding warning to the rest of us. So, we stay as far from them as we can as we descend the creaky wooden stairs. Still, that singular place of unspeakable horror we fear is not this damp under dwelling of our house.
It is not located on the opposite end of the house either, like the attic. Here, the relatives of the basement spiders live to taunt whoever dares to embark on a journey into this world of ancient, and forgotten relics. Things we have stored away years ago, swearing at the time that we would need them one day. “Yes sir, someday I will be looking for this, and I will know right where to find it.” We probably told ourselves that at least 10 years ago. We still didn’t need it, and that’s a good thing because by now, we don’t remember where in the attic we put it. If we did need it now, we’d have to buy another one. No, that place of dark eeriness is not this area of the house.
Nor is it the storage shed out back. That has also become a place where things go to disappear. Tools, rags, owners’ manuals and the such have met their ends in these places out in rear yards across America. These are like an oversized junk drawer from inside the kitchen. Every kitchen has one. Usually the smallest and least accessible drawer in the collection of cabinets. It has every miscellaneous piece of nothing in it, and everything in it is most likely useless. Nuts without bolts, flashlights without batteries, hooks without eyes, and eyes without hooks. Small pieces of twine or string that are not long enough to accomplish anything, and pens on their last drop of ink, and pencils with no lead, or a half-chewed eraser. Every junk drawer in the United States has one of those small pocket-sized calendars in it too. In order to qualify for junk drawer status, these have to be at least two years old, and have to have the name of a Pharmacy or Insurance Agent on them.
Sorry folks, those are all really good guesses for the last place any of us would want to find ourselves in, but they are not the right answer. Even collectively they do not hold a candle to the scariest place in our house. You give up? (No fair reading ahead either.)
Okay, here’s a hint. It is not a room or an area in your house. It occupies an area of a room in your house. Not yet? Okay, let’s see. In most cases it looks different in every house. It can even be in a different location within the room in each house. Still nothing?
If you are guessing, and you were getting closer to the answer it could be said that you are warmer … warmer … warmer … hot … hot … burning up! However, this would be an oxymoron considering what we are looking for. Colder … colder … colder … freezing! Would be a better cheer for your successful search.
Got it? It’s not that easy to see. To be fair, most people would not see this as being the scariest place in their home. There are no spiders, no bugs, and no … well, now, there could be bugs. Spiders, no, but bugs of all kinds, maybe. Depending on how long we have been neglecting our duty in this place.
These things have one door, sometimes two, and even three in some homes. All depends on which model you have. The doors swing open and reveal the entire contents. Almost. That’s the scary part. The hidden things that are lurking just below the surface. When you open the doors, instead of a light going on to help you see, and then a bell, chiming to tell you to close the door, the theme music from the movie Jaws should be what greets you. Or better yet, that creepy organ music like in Phantom of the Opera.
In case you still don’t know … it’s your refrigerator, or do you call it, the fridge? Maybe you still refer to it as an ice box. Whatever you call it, we all have things in there that we do not want to see. They went in as normal fruits, vegetables or leftovers, but what they have become would turn the stomach of the heartiest of souls. All of them, now having the appearance of demon possessed, mad scientist’s laboratory experiments, and creatures that you would not want to meet up with in a dark alley on a cold, stormy night. Killer, ravaging beasts that were once tomatoes, green, leafy, healthy lettuce, ripe and juicy oranges, and last week’s meat loaf. All, are now what you would see on Night of the Living Dead movies. Zombie food, searching for brains.
Tonight, the night before Halloween is celebrated as “Haunted Refrigerator Night.” This is the night when you go to your fridge, without turning on the kitchen light, and open the doors slowly. Let them creak a little if they will, but open them really slow. Just to get the full effect then, unscrew the light bulb and use a flashlight to search for anything that moves. You might want to have a crucifix and a bottle of Holy Water close by. Just in case.
Remember that movie, The Haunted Refrigerator on Elm Street. Yeah, that’s the spirit. Clean out that refrigerator folks!